Strength from Within
by Eristal
Summary: What if the outbreak had started 11 and half years earlier? Ed's abuse is steadily getting worse and worse as the outbreak begins, as he begins to transfer the abuse to Sophia, Carol has to decide if she is strong enough to face the world on her own. If she is how will she survive with a 5 month old baby? Eventual Caryl. Warning: lots of naughty words.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I'm back? Really this is odd, I've not written fanfiction for like five or six years, and now I'm here on a different account. I'm not going to lie to you and tell you that updates are going to be frequent, I'm in college and sometimes things get in the way. But I promise, if this goes well, I will stick with the story. I might update twice a week, I might update once every other week. Sometimes I just get excited from reviews and post early. Hint, hint. Rest assured I will always update each month. BTW: Don't own the walking dead, if I did there would be immense amount of Caryl in every episode.  
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The bruise on my cheek ached something fierce. I guess that's what you get for saying no. I looked down at my wedding ring, what a sham. To love and protect, till' death do us part. Bastard. Thirteen years of my life wasted. I glanced in my rear-view mirror. Sophia, the only thing that made my world pure and beautiful, the only thing that gave me hope. Barely 5 months old, and she was already quiet and complacent, don't wake up Daddy. Don't get in Daddy's way. Don't touch that. Be quiet. I always told her, I guess in some respects, it's my fault.

She was asleep, her little blond ringlets rested on her forehead. Her eyes closed but I knew that when she opened them would be a bluish green. She had her fathers nose, but thankfully everything else was me. I had managed to bear the brunt of the abuse but not all of it. On her tiny pale legs there were deep purple finger shaped marks. I for some reason thought that she was safe from him; I bared the brunt of the abuse. It was a foolish thing to think. No longer would he put a hand on me or my daughter, Ed was dead to me. Completely and utterly dead.

As soon as I saw what he did I knew it was time to leave. We hadn't left our little house since the nation-wide quarantine went into effect. Occasionally these, things, came to the doors and windows but the emergency broadcast said not to open them. So I didn't, I stayed inside, eventually covering the windows with blankets and I pushed a dresser against the door. But we began to run low on food after the first week. Almost all of the perishables had been eaten, all the meat cooked, and the vegetables and fruits ground up into mush for Sophia. We were left with the bare minimum, pasta and canned foods.

Ed became more and more irate as we began to run out of food. The beatings slowly began to become more frequent and more brutal. Every inch of my body had some type of bruise, and my lips seemed to be always split. Thankfully he hadn't knocked out any teeth yet. I was sure that my wrist was sprained, and my ribs were bruised.

We hit the three-week mark when the power went out. Luckily we got our water from a well outside in the backyard. I went out everyday happy that we at least had water, I was also grateful of the block walls that separated us from our neighbors. Every time I went out I could hear the moaning and groaning of the things that were occasionally out in our front yard.

Eventually we ran out of our meager supply of dry and canned food since Ed had always liked the fresh stuff so we never stocked up on non-perishables. He finally got fed up with the tiny meals and barked at me that there were MREs in the attic, and he was tired of the shit I'd been feeding him. He pushed me towards the stairs, and I landed painfully on the steps. I shakily climbed the rest of the way and pulled down the drawstring to the stairs to the attic in the hallway and climbed my way up the steep steps. It was dusty, full of Christmas, Halloween, and Easter decorations that I hadn't used since the first year of our marriage. Holidays in our household had disappeared since our first year. He said it was a waste of money.

I pushed the old Santa Claus dummy out of the way, making a path to the back of the attic, tripping over dusty boxes. I finally made it to the back and opened a box that had black marker written on it, Ed's Military Stuff. Opening it the first thing on top was his old Military uniform. Green fatigues, with a name patch on the left side that said E. Peletier, on the right it said U.S Army. Underneath that was his medals and old service paperwork of his time in the army, he was once a good man alcohol had changed that. I shuffled through the rest finally realizing that there were no MREs in this box. Just old memories that should die. I shut the box and pushed it back to the corner where it could stay there and collect dust.

I opened the next box and it was what I was looking for, filled to the brim with silver metallic packets of MREs. I shut the box and tried to pick it up. Jesus, it must've weighed close to 30 pounds. I steeled myself and hauled it up to my hip. I carefully made my way down across the attic, thankful that I had made myself a path. The only problem was getting down the steps. I placed the box near the edge and lowered myself onto the first steps. I slid the box towards me into my arms but I knew that it was going to be impossible for me to carry the thing down completely. I was so weak, giving my extra food to Sophia, surviving on the bare minimum, was taking a toll on my body. My pants were beginning to fall off my hips, and all my clothes were slowly starting to get baggier. Who knew that the Apocalypse was the best weight loss program?

I knew that calling Ed to help was going to be useless; he barely left his couch in the living room. I slide it further towards me and then I knew that it was going to go over. It finally teetered over the edge as it fell as did I. I hit the ground hard; the box hit me even harder. The entire upper floor shook with the impact. The pictures on the walls rattled, some shattered to the ground. The wind was completely knocked out of me; I stayed on the ground for a couple seconds, surrounded by packets of MREs, trying to catch my breath.

Then I heard the pounding of steps down the stairs. Oh no. I struggled to my feet trying to regain my breath as I started shoving the packets into the box. But I wasn't fast enough; he came into view as I was placing the last of them into the box. He must've yelled something and I was pushed up against the wall, my head cracking painfully against the drywall. Spots danced in my vision. He kneed me in my already sore stomach and I doubled over. A backhand across the face sent me to the ground landing in the broken glass. The sting of new wounds kept me conscious. He kicked me once, twice, three times, I looked up at him, and he was red faced and panting, his stomach wobbling slightly every time he breathed out. Anger was panted clear as day on his face; he grabbed the back of my head pulling me up by my hair. "Clean this up." He growled. He let go of my hair suddenly, causing my face to land in some shards of glass. He turned away from me and picked up the box, leaving the couple on the ground. I guess those were mine. He thumped down the stairs, and for a couple of minutes everything was quiet and then Sophia started crying.

Gingerly I pulled myself up, not wanting to get more glass stuck in me. I gathered the four MREs left on the floor, set them on the attic stairs, and went to go calm Sophia.

"Shut this stupid ass kid up!" I hurried my steps, but I was so sore that I could only manage a limp down the stairs. "I guess I have to do everything around here!" I was halfway down the stairs when Sophia started to scream bloody murder. I had never heard her like that before. Mustering all of my strength I managed to walk briskly down the rest of the steps. I turned the corner to the kitchen where I left Sophia to eat the last bit of the noodles I had given her. The box of MREs was placed in the doorway and then I saw Ed holding my baby. His fingers curled into talons, digging into her fragile legs, shaking her to try to stop her crying.

"Finally, lazy whore." He yelled, practically throwing my daughter at me, pushing his way out of the kitchen. Sophia's weight combined with the push into the doorway, had me seeing spots. I took a few steps into the kitchen bracing myself against the counter. Sophia had started to calm down, her screams quieting into whimpers and gasps. "Shh sweetheart." I murmured kissing her curls. Her little face looked at me and that was the moment I knew we had to leave. Oozing blood, and with a black and blue face, I looked back at her and I made a promise. "We're not staying here another day, I swear to god we are gone tomorrow morning." I gave her another kiss and set her back in her highchair.

**A/N: So did you like it? My own particular brand of writing is a bit odd, but I really like having my characters to tell a story within a story. Next time we'll meet some interesting people! Review please. Muah!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: So second chapter eh? **

I hobbled my way into the bathroom. It was devoid of any light since I had covered all of the windows, but it didn't matter I knew where everything was by heart. I opened the medicine cabinet and took out the peroxide, the cotton balls, Band-Aids, gauze, and tweezers. I readied my tweezers and prepared to dig the shards of glass out of the palm of my hand. Taking a deep breath I fished the first piece out, it stung like hell. I did this 12 more times each time the shards clinked against the porcelain sink. My eyes had adjusted to the dark and I could see the blood running down my arm and onto the bathroom sink. I checked my arm, there was no deep cuts and any glass that was there seemed to have been superficial and had fallen out on it's own. I poured the peroxide onto the cotton ball and held back the whimper as I dabbed the wounds on my palm watching them sizzle. I wrapped the palm of my hand in gauze and repeated the process on my arm, only this time covering my arm in a dozen little waterproof Band-Aids.

The part I was dreading the most was my face. I had had glass stuck in my face before, but I had to go to the hospital and get it removed by a professional because the pieces were so deep. I hopped that it wasn't that bad, hell I hadn't heard an ambulance, a cop car, or even a plane in over three weeks so who knew if there were any hospitals left anymore.

I looked at myself in the mirror, something I avoided doing as much as possible, and I was a wreck. My face looked like a monsters. Blood dripped from my cheek, running down my face onto my now soiled white polka-dot shirt. I must say the shirt wasn't a big loss; it was the ugliest shirt in my wardrobe. Something Ed had forced me to wear, heck most of my wardrobe was something Ed forced me to wear at one time or another. I winced as I ran my fingers over the largest wound on my cheek; there was definitely glass in there. I prodded the rest of the cuts dotted over the left side of my face, and it seemed that today I was lucky; the only cut that had glass in it was the largest one on the apple of my cheek. I prepared the tweezers and it seemed like the pain lasted forever. Each time I removed a piece of glass there seemed to be another six pieces that popped up to be removed. My face was a bloody mess by the time I was finished. I wasn't sure if the cut needed sutures, but I knew that I would never be able to do that myself. I repeated the process of peroxide. I covered the largest cut with the biggest band-aid I had, and left the more superficial cuts out to the elements to scab over. I rubbed some of the dried blood off of my face with some toilet paper. I cleaned the mess the best I could, dumping most of it in the trashcan next to the toilet.

I walked out of the bathroom my eyes immediately fixed to Sophia. She was asleep, propped awkwardly against her high chair, her hand grasping a noodle. "My sweet girl." I gently picked her up. "Time for bed, huh?" I made my way to the stairs, dodging the box in the kitchen entryway, trying to make my way upstairs as quietly as possible, I didn't want to reawaken the beast that was snoring loudly on the couch. I was sore all over and just getting up the stairs was a huge feat for me. I held back every whimper and groan I so desperately wanted to express. I made it to the landing and I breathed a sigh of relief.

Upstairs was our safe haven. Ed stopped coming up here since Sophia had been born. He didn't want to be disturbed by the cry of the baby, and now he mostly kept to himself downstairs, only coming up to grab a change of clothes, which now, he only does rarely. The broken frame, still lie on the floor, and my blood was smeared on the hardwood floor. I picked up the MREs and made my way to mine and Sophia's room. It was painted a dull yellow color, with a beaten up crib, that I had gotten from a yard sale, against the wall. The bed in the center of the room was only big enough to hold two people, and it was covered with a patchwork quilt. Dressers dotted around the room, and the closet held a meager amount of bland clothes. I put Sophia in the crib and covered her with the only blanket I had, a worn light blue blanket with tiny sheep on it.

I went to the closet and shoved all of my clothes into the small duffle bag that we had used when we went to go visit his family up in Vermont. I dumped all of Sophia's clothes in there as well, and I put the three MREs into the bag, saving one to eat later. I grabbed the small amount of Sophia's diapers that were left, leaving a diaper and a onesie out, I then threw the knitted throw blanket into the bag that Ed's grandmother had knitted as the start of our marriage that we had never used. I went to the dressers dumping all the underwear I owned in there. Was that it? Was that all I had to my name, a half full duffle bag, and a couple days worth of food? I looked around the room it was barren to begin with why would I expect anything different?

I shoved the bag back into the closet and quietly shut the door. I picked up the MRE, Spaghetti; I read the instructions on the back. Just add water and close. I opened up the packets, removing the utensils and the weird biscuit looking thing. I picked up the gallon jug of water by my bed pouring roughly the amount needed and I closed it. It did whatever chemical magic it does, and became very hot.

As awful as it was, it was the first filling meal I'd had in weeks. My stomach felt full to the brim, and I fell asleep soon after, sore and in pain, but content.

I woke early the next morning to Sophia's cries to be changed. I eased my aching body off of the soft bed and went to my daughter. I picked her up and placed her on the dresser, I took off her pink onesie, noticing for the first time the bloodstains marring the light surface. My blood. I changed her with the one diaper I set out, and putting her in the yellow onesie I set out the night before. I put her back in the crib for the time being as I prepared to get us out of this hellhole. I moved the curtain and peeked out the window. It was barely daybreak, and none of those things were in the front yard yet. Ed surely wouldn't be up this early. I opened the closet and put the remaining jug of water into the bag. I picked up the bag slinging it over my shoulder and it bumped painfully against my sore side. I picked up Sophia securing her to my hip and left the room. I tried to be as quiet as a mouse avoiding the broken frame, and the squeaks the floor occasionally made. Down the stairs I went, stopping before I got to the bottom to make sure that he was still snoring. He was.

I stopped in the kitchen entryway. I needed more food; quietly I unzipped my bag and knelt down to show some more MREs into the bag. I dropped them in my bag one at a time afraid that if I grabbed a handful it would make too much noise and wake him. I had to be careful not to weigh myself down. I emptied about half of the box into my bag; it was all the weight I would be able to carry. I breathed a sigh of relief as I zipped the bag up for the last time. Now my only obstacle was removing the dresser from the front door.

That was sure to make some noise. I set her and the bag down close to the door, making sure that if he did come at me I'd be able to grab her and go. I braced my hands on the dresser and pushed. It scraped against the floor, leaving dark scratches on the hardwood, it creaked and groaned and I knew that it wouldn't be long until Ed was awake.

I had made enough room to open the door slightly, and I might be able to squeeze myself through the doorway. I was so happy that my plans were coming to fruition that I didn't notice that his snoring had stopped and his heavy footsteps were coming my way. Sophia started crying and I turned to go comfort her when I was backhanded on the right side of my face. I leaned heavily against the dresser as I turned to look at my monster.

"You think you could leave bitch? You belong to me." I tuned out the rest of the poisonous words coming out of his mouth. I looked away from him, and lady luck was smiling on me today. Sitting on the dresser were our wedding pictures. I had laid them down flat when I pushed the dresser to the door so I wouldn't break them. With more agility than I thought I had, I picked up the largest frame and smashed it against his meaty face. The glass shattered and he fell to the ground hitting his head hard against the edge of the kitchen's doorway. A deep gash was marred his skin and blood poured across his face. That was the last time he was going to put his hands on me.

I stood, suddenly feeling empowered for once I was in control of the situation instead of him. He was the one on the ground this time instead of me. He groaned cupping his face and focusing his disoriented hate filled eyes onto my form. He tried to stand but he fell pitifully back to the floor, covering his face with his sausage fingers. "You'll pay for this." He growled. "You and your little whelp." I turned from him, certain he wasn't in any way able to get up at the moment, shoved the dresser one last time and grabbed the keys from the hook next to the door. I picked up Sophia and slung the heavy bag over my shoulder and opened the door for the first time in many weeks. I didn't bother closing it. There were no things in the front yard, but across the street there were a couple of them shambling around.

I ran as fast as I could to the car, I clicked it open, and threw the bag in the back seat and secured Sophia into the car seat. Jogging around the driver's side I opened the door and put the keys into the ignition. The small suburban started without a problem. I only had half a tank but I was sure that I'd be able to get some gas at the station down the road. I backed out the driveway and turned left, heading towards the main street that would lead me to the highway. I took one last look at the tiny blue house that I had spent the last thirteen years of my life. The grass was overgrown and the little flowers I had put around the property had long since died off. It seemed like there was a dark cloud hanging over the house, but maybe that was my imagination. I checked the mirrors, and only at thirty I looked like a forty year old, my chestnut hair had grey streaks through it, multiple scars dotted my face, and I had a slight wrinkle on my forehead. Ed appeared in the doorway, as I took my last look, I sped off and I could hear him shouting at the car, telling me to get my ass out of the car or else. I thanked god that I had made it out of that house alive.

I must've been twenty miles away when I started to run out of gas. There was no gas station open, and anyone of them I came across said out of gas. Sophia and me were getting hungry, we hadn't eaten since the night before, and the sun was hanging low in the sky now. We hadn't had any trouble with the shambling human-like creatures that limped around various homes and parking lots. I pulled into a parking lot that looked like it was deserted, cars parked at odd angles and all of them seemed as silent at the grave. I pulled up to the very front of the store, and looked at my sleeping daughter in the rearview mirror again. I shut off the car and crawled into the backseat to cuddle my daughter. I picked her up and leaned back against the seat breathing in her baby scent. "We're safe sweetie. He'll never hurt us again." I closed my eyes and suddenly felt so exhausted. It was only noon and I felt like I needed to be dead to the world for a couple of hours. I could feel myself drifting off into dreamland.

I was awoken to the thump on my car window. Sophia had drooled a small puddle on my shirt. She was fast asleep and probably very hungry. I looked out the window, the sun had fallen behind the horizon and it was pitch black outside. The thing that was pounding on my window just looked like a black blob. _Thump, thump, thump, pause, thump._ At every thump I could feel my heart begin to race. Maybe it was Ed, maybe it was one of those shambling creatures that I viewed as I drove past. A groan, and then the thumping resumed.

"Jesus lady open up!" I stared stupidly out the window as the male blob called from outside. "C'mon, it's not safe out here. The Walkers are gonna get you." I blinked. Walkers? Is that what they were called? I didn't know what to do. I could open the door and talk to this blob, or I could crawl to the front seat and drive a couple more miles down the road and run out of gas, and be stranded. I chose to open the door. Standing in the low moonlight was and Asian teenager, with a sprinkling of acne dotted around his face.

"Shit, we gotta run." I looked at him owlishly. In the low light I could make out the forms of bodies twisted in strange formations. "Into the store, go!" The Asian kid grabbed my arm and pulled Sophia and me out of the car. I secured Sophia on my hip and ran on shaky legs into the store. The young man reached the door before me and began prying the sliding door open, another. He eventually got the door open enough for me to be able squeeze through. Sophia clung to be like a baby Koala, whimpering slightly in hunger.

As I entered the store the first thing I noticed was the crossbow aimed at my face.

**A/N: Dun Dun DUNNNNN! So I hope you enjoyed that, if not let me know how I can improve, if you loved it then leave me a review. Muah! **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Woot, thanks for all the support guys! Without further ado, let's get this party started! **

The kid behind me swiftly shut the door and secured a chain over the door. "Lower the shutters. " He called to the other people in the store. I didn't dare look away from the crossbow that was pointed at me, and by proxy, my daughter. "Whoa, whoa, Daryl, she has a kid. She's not gonna harm us."

"What the hell you thinkin' kid?" He growled, his face tense with anger. "You know the god damned rules." He lowered his crossbow. He fixed his eyes on Sophia for a couple of moments, and then on me. "You'll leave in the mornin' if our council decides that ya should go. Glenn 'ere will show you where you can sleep." He took a step closer to me, blue eyes glinting dangerously. It was obviously his attempt to threaten me, his body was tense and he slightly lowered the crossbow. I met his eyes without fear, even though I was shaking inside. I had faced worse men than him. He raised his eyebrows in mild surprise; I guess he was expecting me to cower in his presence, much like many others I assumed had in the past. Tall man, big crossbow, he reminded me of a wolf, all tall and lean, his body roped with slight muscles, his eyes calculating me as his future prey, and not in a sexy way, a very much, I'll put an arrow in your head if you so much as blink wrong kind of way. He took one last look at me and stalked away. I kept my eyes on his leather angel wing vest, as he turned the corner.

"Don't mind Daryl, he's not so bad." Glenn sighed. "He's just trying to protect us. We've lost people in the past, good people." His eyes glazed over and he looked away from me, and rubbed his eyes. "I'm sure you're hungry," my stomach rumbled as he mentioned food. He gave me a small smile. "I'll walk you over to Lori, she must have some leftovers from dinner."

The store was in shambles. Most of the food was gone off of the shelves, and various products littered the floor. Blood smears were dotted around the checkout areas and down the aisle. But for the most part the store was pretty intact, four walls, a roof, and large metal shutters blocking the windows and doors, it seemed like the perfect place to stay. We kept walking through the store until we reached the break room.

I knew that this wasn't the world that I was living in three or four weeks ago. This world had different rules, rules that involved life or death. Kill or be killed, I may be new to this, but from the destruction I had seen on my short journey here, the bodies laid out rotting, and the things now called walkers devouring any living thing they could get their hands on.

Glenn pushed the door open revealing a slight woman with long brown hair sorting out the cabinet, and rocking a baby that looked about the same age as Sophia. "Hey, Lori? We've got a new person, and from the sounds of her stomach she's pretty hungry." Glenn laughed slightly. Lori turned and focused her eyes on me, she raised an eyebrow slightly taking in my battered appearance and then finally Sophia, who was snuggled in my side sucking on her thumb. She smiled at her. "Well I'm sure we can find something." She turned back to the counter pulling down a can of what looked like Spaghetti O's, and a jar of baby food. "Glenn go on, I'm sure we can manage on our own, besides you probably have to go on watch in awhile. You know how Rick get's when you're late." Glenn fidgeted slightly, he seemed unsure whether or not to leave me alone with a member of his group. "Go, I have my gun if she tries somethin'." I blanched, clearly it didn't matter if I had a child in my arms I was still considered a threat. Glenn gave Lori a quick shaky smile and he turned, and quickly strode out of the room.

She set the cans of food down on the well-used table. "We only run the generators for a hour a day so you, unfortunately, will be eating this cold." She gestured for me to sit down, as she plonked a plastic fork and spoon onto the table. I didn't hesitate, Sophia must've been starving, she hadn't eaten since last night, and quite frankly I was surprised that she wasn't crying up a storm, telling me how unhappy she was. I slid the jar towards me, strawberries and bananas, yum.

"You hungry sweet girl?" I clicked open the jar, stirring it slightly with the spoon. I scooped out a decent amount on the spoon and airplaned into her mouth. Thankfully she seemed to like it, and pretty soon she devoured the entire jar in record time. Her face was a mess, pink bits of the baby food clung to her chubby little cheeks like slime. "Here." I looked up; Lori was offering me a wet wipe. I muttered a quiet thanks, and proceeded to clean her the best that I could. "How old is she?" Lori asked setting herself down in the chair across from me.

"5 and a half months." I whispered reaching for the can of food and the opener, as Sophia snuggled into my side.

"She's about the same age as Carl. He's 6 months next week." I nodded, clicking open the Spaghetti Os and shoveling the cold mush in my mouth like it was gonna be my last meal. Lori looked on in amusement and mild disgust. "So, how long you've been out there?"

"A day." I mumbled between bites.

"Only a day, well aren't you lucky." Lori snorted. "So how'd you know we were here? Did your group send you? Judging by the look of you they beat you, maybe to give you an easy in to our group."

I stopped eating, pushing the half full can slightly away from me even though my stomach was still grumbling. "I…I…don't have a group. I just needed some more food and gas. Everything I passed was either over run or empty." I tensed. "As for my face…well…" I cut off. This woman, this stranger didn't need to know why I was like this, she didn't need to know that my own personal monster was probably still alive and kicking.

She harrumphed, clearly not believing me, and slid away from the table just as Carl started to whine. "Finish up, I'll show you where you can sleep and get some diapers for her." She turned away from me, unsnapping Carl's purple onsie preparing to change him.

I ate quickly, wanting to get out of this tense situation. I kept my eyes on the holster on her hip for the remaining time. I finished just as she snapped a new diaper onto him.

"Done? Good let's go." She walked swiftly out the door just as I pushed myself from the table. Sophia clung to my neck, burying her little face into my shoulder. I rubbed her back absentmindedly as I followed Lori through the store, keeping my eyes fixed ahead as I passed a number of people, all glaring at me. We turned the corner into the baby section, and she gave me a box of diapers and a couple jars of baby food. There wasn't much left in this aisle, a couple bits and bob that people didn't think was important. Most of the diapers were gone save for from my estimation, twelve boxes.

"You have a choice to sleep with the others or you can go to the roof and sleep." I grimaced with the thought of sleeping around a bunch of strangers staring me down the entire night. It was still warm at night in Georgia, and with a blanket and some pillows the roof might not be too bad. Lori quirked her eyebrow waiting for an answer.

"Roof please." She nodded and made a detour to the tiny apparel section. She threw me an oversized University of Atlanta sweater and a small pillow with a panther on it. We made our way to the back of the store, passing more glaring people, and hushed conversations. She pushed open the plastic doors leading to the storage area, and as the doors swung open the four men inside stopped talking. An older gentleman with a rifle, Glenn, a stocky black man with a gap in his teeth, and a man in a sheriffs uniform, stood still staring at us.

"She wants the roof." Lori explained. A man with brown hair in a sheriff's uniform stepped foreword.

"You and Carl were alone with her?" Lori nodded. "God dammit Glenn!" He glared over his shoulder at the Asian boy. "He knows that he's not supposed to leave new comers unattended. Did anyone bother to check her?" Nobody said anything. He huffed in obvious annoyance. He stepped towards me removing the things that were clutched under my arm. He tried to take Sophia from my arms but I curled myself protectively into her, taking several steps back. No one was going to touch my baby without my permission.

"Ma'm I have to check you for weapons. If you don't let us check you, then you're going to have to leave." He growled as I didn't make any movements to hand my daughter over to one of them. He turned back to the group of people. "What's her name?" Blank stares greeted him. "No one bothered to ask her her name? Where she came from, nothing?" His voice started to get louder and louder as he continued on.

Sophia whimpered, and fat lazy tears started to streak down her cheek. I tuned out the man as he continued yelling at the people behind him. I cuddled Sophia to my chest wiping her tears away with my thumb. "Shh, it's going to be okay sweet girl." Her whimpers turned into full blown sobbing as the yelling continued. Her little body was shaking violently in my arms from fear. I slid down the wall, sitting on the ground, protectively caging my arms around her.

The plastic door blew open, and before I got a proper look at the person he was yelling, "Shut the fuck up! You're gonna bring all the walkers for miles with the racket you're makin'!" It was the man with the crossbow, Daryl, if I remembered correctly. He turned to walk out of the room but he caught his eyes on Sophia and me. "Do any of you assholes have eyes? Can't you see that you're scarin' 'em? Fuck! Do I gotta do everythin' myself?" He slung the crossbow on his backing, picking up the small pile of items on the floor. "C'mon woman!" He stalked off towards the stairs to the left of the door. I awkwardly stood, my arms still wrapped around my daughter, not making any eye contact to the people standing there in shock. I followed the man up the steep stairs, following the thumping of angry boots. The door at the top slammed open and I took the stairs two at a time to keep up.

I emerged onto the roof just as he plopped the items onto a table that they must've dragged up there. There was another man on the roof circling around the edge. He regarded us with mild interest before continuing on with his rounds.

"Ya got any weapons?" The man grumbled. I shook my head no. "Why the hell not? S'not safe to be without any." I didn't bother to answer; my story probably would've seemed like a big fat lie. What was I supposed to say? I was in my house with blankets and towels draped over windows with a dresser blocking the door, trapped by my abusive husband with a 5 month old baby. Yeah that story seemed believable, especially since I saw the destruction of the homes driving here. "What's your name?" he growled, clearly not enjoying that he was forced in the position of interrogating me. I thought briefly about lying to him, but if they searched my car they would probably find my ID or something pertaining to my identity. "Carol." I whispered. "Where's your husband?" He asked nodding to my wedding rings.

"Dead." Technically he was dead to me, if he was still living or breathing I didn't care in the least. The man grunted his insincere condolences. "Don't be." I whispered.

"He the one who gave you them?" He asked gesturing to my face. I didn't answer, no need to confirm what he thought happened already. Sophia had tired herself out she was now sleeping in my arms. "What'd you do for a livin' before shit hit the fan?" I now knew that I had to lie. I couldn't say I was a stay at home mom that would just make me another useless expendable member of the group. I didn't know anyone in this world, heck even in the previous one. I wasn't allowed to have friends; Ed thought that it would distract me from my wifely duties. I wanted to be a nurse before I met Ed. I was planning my entire future, go to college, be a nurse, meet a nice guy, have 3 kids and a dog. Be happy. I knew that there had to be safety in numbers in this world, and they seemed to be well armored.

"A nurse. I was a nurse." I blurted out before I could stop myself. I had patched myself up hundreds of times before; doing it to others couldn't be too hard.

"Well I'll be damned. It seems we just hit the jackpot." Daryl smirked slightly.

**A/N: So hey look another chapter down! I promise the action will start up, I'm not great at writing romance type stuff but I figured that Daryl wouldn't be great at it either. But lets not get too far ahead of ourselves. I love the slow burn in romances, and they just met each other. As you can tell my Daryl and Carol are a bit OCC but hey it was a decade earlier maybe they were different back then. Muah! Don't forget to review!**


	4. Chapter 4

Daryl left shortly after that, grunting a soft goodbye he was down the stairs. I set up our temporary camp behind a large air conditioning unit, blocking myself from direct view of the door. I cleaned up Sophia best I could and wrapped her in the large sweater, and I propped her against the pillow. She was out like a light, I tried to settle my mind enough to sleep but it was futile. This night was a nightmare of epic proportions. With all the adrenaline that had been coursing through me since I had been yanked out of the car, I had forgotten about the amount of pain I was in. My bruises ached something fierce, and I was sure my wrist was sprained, maybe even broken.

All of my supplies were in the car still. The clothes, diapers, MRE's, water, and the blanket. It didn't seem like much but it brought me a certain semblance of comfort. I would have to ask Glenn or Daryl in the morning if I could grab it. I didn't trust any of the members in the group yet. Glenn seemed like he was the type that wore his heart on his sleeve, a boy forced to turn into a man much to early. Daryl was brash, loud, and had a heck of a mouth on him. But he seemed fiercely loyal, and protective, hence, the crossbow in my face. He came to Sophia's aid when he saw how scared she was, he clearly went out of his comfort zone to make sure we didn't have to deal with the Sheriff. From the half hour I was with Lori she seemed like she was nice, but as soon as she heard something she didn't like she turned on me. She reminded me of the girls in high school that would gossip behind your back but be nice to you up front. The Sheriff looked like he ran a tight ship, but he looked a bit frazzled with everything that was thrust upon him. Quick to fly off the handle if something didn't go his way.

The other people here didn't look like they welcomed new comers easily, what with the glares and whispers I got. I choose the roof because I was scared that someone might not welcome a new person in the group and react violently. Besides it seemed safer than staying so close to the walkers that were outside. I let Sophia sleep, making sure that she was in a firm indent in the pillow, as I stood up to look over the edge, making sure I kept her in my sights at all times. There didn't look like there were many of them out there. A dozen or so ambling about the parking lot, bumping into cars trying to find any food.

Some looked grotesque, limbs missing, innards trailing behind them like a macabre wedding dress. But some looked like regular people, people that I would pass on the street or in the grocery store and I wouldn't think twice about it. They moved in a weird sorta dance formation, one would step one way and another the other way, and their arms and hands would continually jerk out and grasp imaginary food.

If I closed my eyes I could almost imagine the parking lot and how it used to be. Shiny cars, and happy families, laughing. The hot dog stand that was always operational at the front of the store. Teenage kids pushing the carts around the parking lot, sweaty and secretly hating their job. The constant stream of customers complaining, buying enough food to feed armies, the smells of fresh baked bread from the bakery. That was all gone now. I didn't see how the world could return to how it was a few short weeks prior.

I heard the bombs go off. We lived very far away from Atlanta, but I could still hear the bombs go off. Ed said it was nothing. But I knew that millions of people had just been killed. The last transmission we heard from the old radio Ed kept was that all major cities had been overrun, stay away from the cities. The government plans to bomb the cities, and sure enough a couple of days later the bombs dropped. We had no more transmissions after that. The power went out a day later.

I sighed and stepped away from the edge and returned to my daughter. She was still sleeping, her little face relaxed her thumb in her mouth. I lay down next to her, using my arm as a pillow I fell into a restless sleep.

Sophia's cries woke me up the next morning. I rubbed the sleep from my eyes. Someone was hungry, and probably had a mess in their diaper. "Day 2 without Ed. We're making progress honey bun." I sat up creaking my neck and back. I pulled the sweater off of her, and proceeded to do what I had to do. "How about we go find a spoon for breakfast?" I hitched her on my hip, like usual, and pushed our little set up close to the air conditioning box so it wouldn't be in anyone's way. As I stood up I saw that Glenn was on watch. He gave me a short wave and I headed to the stairs. I took them slowly since there was no light in the cramped space. I reached the bottom, thankful that there was nobody in what I realized now was the stock room. I made my way through the plastic door and out into the main floor. There were groups of people set up everywhere, eating breakfast. They all stopped as soon as I walked in, focusing their eyes on me as I moved back towards the break room, the only place I felt like I wouldn't break any rules, and I knew that there would be spoons in there.

I kept my head down as I walked making sure to not meet anybodies gaze. They were obviously weary of any new comers, and very protective of the place that they now called home. I was nearly to the room when I bumped into someone. I looked up quickly and apologized. It was the Sheriff.

"Carol." He nodded. "I'm sorry about yesterday, wasn't your fault. We just have procedures here, and Glenn didn't follow them. We'll be deciding if you can stay after breakfast, so I'd hurry if I were you."

"Okay." I whispered meekly, suddenly afraid that they knew that I was lying and they were just going to throw me, and Sophia, to the walkers. I hurried the rest of the way to the break room, glad to see there were only a couple of people hanging around. Lori was serving what looked like some powdered eggs and some sausage that hadn't gone off yet. She raised her eyebrow at me and scooped out a small serving and half of a sausage onto the plate and handed it to me.

"Um. Can I have a spoon? I need to feed her." She looked at me like I was stupid and gestured to the counter behind her, where I didn't see the plastic forks and spoons laid out. I grabbed a spoon and started to dart out of there, not wanting to stay a second longer. Today it seemed was not my day because another person blocked the doorway. I glanced up, Daryl; I gave him a slight smile and moved to squeeze my way past him.

"Hold up." He blocked the small entrance to the doorway with his arm, being careful to not touch me. "Whys she getting' less than everyone else?"

"She ain't stayin', no need to waste food on a dead woman." Lori said nonchalantly. She was talking about my life like it meant nothing, and I guess to her it didn't. I was a potential threat to her family; if our roles were reversed I probably would've done the same.

"How you know that Olive Oyl? You the council? You make those decisions all on your lonesome?" He growled; she looked obviously shocked, maybe no one had questioned her decisions before. "Fuck it, give me ma food. No need ta get involved with this shit." He grumbled under his breath. Lori handed him an ample portion of eggs, and two sausages. Still standing in the doorway I turned to leave, when he grabbed the plate out of my hands and thrust his own plate into mine.

It may have just been a second of kindness, something that I hadn't had from a man since my first year of marriage, but my eyes stung with unshed tears. As quickly as he arrived he was gone. Striding down the hallway, going to where ever he set his camp for the night. I looked back at Lori and she looked like a fish caught out of water. I turned away from her, practically running out of the room to catch up to him. He must be hungry and the portion of what Lori gave me wasn't enough to feed a child much less a grown man. I lost sight of him when he turned the corner into the meat section. Much like the rest of the store this area was cleared out, they must've cooked and eaten all of it over time. But there he was sitting on a sleeping bag with his crossbow next to him, almost finished with the meager breakfast.

"Thank you for doing that." I started. "But I'd feel bad if that's all you had to eat until lunch."

He grunted. "S'not a big deal. I've been without for much longer than just a couple of hours." I crouched in front of him, and started to scoop half my eggs onto his plate along with a sausage.

"There, thank you again, no ones been that nice to me in a long time." He looked up at me his face expressionless, and nodded. I gave him a weak smile, and turned to go back up to the roof.

"Olive Oyl, shouldn't of done that. Ya ain't goin' nowhere." He grumbled. I turned back around to maybe thank him again, but he was already laying down his arm over his eyes, the plate of food sitting next to him untouched, but I knew as soon as I left it'd be gone. I smiled slightly going back up to the roof.

I ate the tasteless eggs and sausage quickly before I started to feed Sophia. I tried to give her a bit of the yellow abomination that they called eggs but she immediately spit it out, before I popped open the jar of mashed carrots. She enjoyed them much more, eating it quickly. She was a messy eater and I had nothing to clean her up with. I did the best I could by stripping the pillow of its pillowcase and ripping it best as I could with my feeble strength.

"Carol, it's time." I was so caught up with trying to rip strips from the pillowcase that the Sheriff startled me. I nodded and followed him down the stairs, Sophia's mess be damned. "Don't worry, if they decide to cast you out I'll make sure that we give you a bit of fuel and a couple of cans of food." We turned into the main shopping center and they had set up seven chairs in a circle. "Just stand in the middle. They'll ask you some questions, and then we'll decide." I stood awkwardly in the middle of the circle, and adjusted Sophia. Sheriff took one of the chairs, and then one by one the council started to take shape. All of the men I had saw the night before sat. Then a thin beautiful black woman, another well built black man, then Daryl took a seat farthest away from everybody.

The atmosphere was tense, and as soon as the seats were filled people started to come from all corners of the store. There weren't many of them, 12 at most. But one thing that struck me was that all of the little families seemed to missing key members of their units. Some were missing a father, some a mother.

"This meeting has been called to decide if Carol, and her daughter are welcome in our camp." The Sheriff began. "If she is not welcome, then we will send her with a weeks worth of provisions for her and the child, along with a bit of gas. We will now hear arguments for and against her staying. Carol, of course you are allowed to defend yourself." The Sheriff then started his argument. "We're already running low on provisions we can't afford to feed another two people. Besides another baby means that we're a easier target for walkers. I say that we send her out, I'm sure that there would be a more accommodating group will be able to take her in."

"How can you say that Rick?" The older man gasped clearly shocked. "What if that was Lori? What if that was Carl? You can't send her out there on her own; she wouldn't make it a day. Daryl said she doesn't have any weapons, I doubt she knows how to use a gun. You're giving her a death sentence." He looked imploringly at Rick.

The black woman interjected. "Dale, we don't know for sure where she came from. It could be another situation like the marauders. We lost good people that day. Half of our men, men who were our defense, we have only a few able bodies left. If they come back we're done for, and they'll probably come back because of her. By the looks of her they didn't want her to leave. I'm sure Tyresse will agree with me on this, right?"

"I don't. She has a child; she looks like she fought hard to get out of wherever she was. Do you really wanna see that little girl be eaten apart by Walkers Sasha?" Sasha blanched, looking down at the ground obviously feeling guilty.

"You can't condemn her for something she may never do." Dale pleaded.

"Guy's, stop the arguing. I think we should let her speak for herself." The other black man started. "Where did you come from before the market?

I gulped and looked around the circle. There were no reassuring smiles to be had from any of the surrounding people. "The neighborhood a couple miles south of here." I stammered, and then added. "I didn't have a group. It was just my husband and I. He's dead now." I tried to play up my voice to make it seem like I was sad, but I was probably the worst actress in the world. I could here some of the people surrounding the meeting murmur their opinions.

"How'd ya get them bruises?" Daryl grumbled. I turned to look at him.

"My husband wasn't a nice man." I said simply, proud that I could admit that out loud. If they tried to ask me specifics I probably couldn't give them a straight answer without crumbling into a little pile of emotions. Daryl looked up at my bruised face, and then back down at the floor, playing with the hole in his pants, and clenched his jaw.

I could see the rest of the people glancing at me in pity; even Lori who wasn't on my side at the moment could feel sorry for me. "How did you survive, just the two of you with a baby?" Rick inquired.

"Well, we had the house stocked up pretty well for a couple of weeks. Ed didn't like me going out in public often, so we usually stocked up the house for a couple of weeks. When we ran out of fresh food we ate the stuff stocked up in the cabinets. Our gas was still up and running when I left, so I was able to use the stove. We had a well out back that provided us with water. Ed was in the military, and he liked to collect memorabilia, that memorabilia included MRE's, which are high calorie meals ready to eat, just add water." I stopped talking, probably giving them too much information.

"What'd you do for a living?" Rick asked.

I gulped again. "He didn't tell you?" The rest of the circle members shook their head no shooting a glance to Daryl. "I was a nurse." I stuttered. "Before I had to quit because of Ed." The group's tone suddenly changed, no longer was I a woman who would be draining their supplies, I could be a potential help.

**A/N: So how was that? This chapter was surprisingly difficult to write. We'll be getting into the meat of the story next time, because they can't stay in the grocery store for forever! Review please, Muah! **


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Can we all pause and appreciate the Caryl goodness that took place on last night's episode Consumed. I cried many times, especially because of Tumblr last night, jesus, that episode meant more to me than any other episode this season, it certainly meant more to me than all the Beth and Daryl episodes of last season. I'm not going to spoil anything but the van (AHHHH!) and the car (NOOO!), I sorta knew what was going to happen because I got a little obsessed when last week's episode premiered. Also Laurie Holden ships Caryl, so does Norman Reedus's Mom. Adorable. **

The lie just kept growing. I was creating an entire fake back-story. I went to school at the University of Atlanta, did my nursing school there and graduated and got my RN certificate by the age of 25, and worked in a hospital for 2 years. I met Ed late into my 27th year, got married. After our honeymoon Ed insisted I quit my job and focus on starting a family. Unfortunately for him, I had a hard time getting pregnant, and a year into my marriage I had my first of many miscarriages and Ed started beating me. When I was 31 I had Sophia. It was a complete fabrication, save for the fact that I had Sophia.

The truth was I met Ed fresh out of high school; I was 18 and ready to start my life, freshly accepted into the University of Atlanta ready to start my college career. It was a graduation party when I ran into him. 23 years old newly out of the military, handsome, smart, and charming. He was new, and sophisticated, he looked to have life all figured out, we started dating and three months into our courtship we had sex. I fell pregnant, and at the instance of out deeply religious families we were forced to marry before I started to show. I lost the baby a few weeks after the wedding. The abuse started after two more miscarriages, and into our second year of marriage. That was the truth, not the crap I had spewed out to them.

They believed it. Every single word they believed. I felt the guilt burrow deep in my stomach. These people thought I was a medical professional and I could help them with their illnesses and wounds. Heck, they probably thought that for once god was smiling down on them. I wouldn't be able to use the "I haven't done this in awhile" excuse for long, if they let me stay. Sure I could set dislocated shoulders, stitch wounds, and clean them. But I had no idea how to set bones, diagnose illnesses, do IVs, or hell anything beyond basic first aid.

"I guess we'll take the vote now." Rick started. "All in favor of letting her go?" Sasha raised her hand.

"Nothin' personal Carol, we just don't have the resources." Then the other man sitting beside Tyresse raised his hand. "I'm with Sasha." He murmured.

"That's it?" The group nodded. "All in favor of letting her stay?" Everyone else's hands went up. "Welcome to our home Carol. We'll set you up with some proper supplies, and show you to the pharmacy. We don't know what half the medication does and I'm sure you'll be able to help a little bit." Oh no, I didn't think that I'd be put to the test so soon, I hoped that I would be able to scrounge up some medical magazines, or books, to help my story sound believable. The group surrounding dissipated, no longer looking at me with suspicion. Rick stood and gestured for me to follow him.

"I didn't mean what I said in the beginning." Rick started, as we moved farther back into the store. "I had to make the others want to fight for you to stay, I don't want to force people to follow my decisions blindly. I've been starting to see that happen with some our younger members, and I want to put a stop to it. Civilization may have ended but I don't want our democracy to end." I nodded. It made sense. He wanted people to question his leadership, to make different suggestions, he wanted his group to respect and follow his choices but feel free to make their own choices. "The council makes a lot of the decisions, but they look to me to make major ones regarding runs for different supplies, who's one watch, and of course if we're ever under attack. I was a police officer before this happened. I had just been promoted when the virus hit." I made a noncommittal noise and we kept walking, an awkward silence descended on us and I choose to ignore it.

We reached the small pharmacy. It was a disaster area; it had probably succumbed to looters when it started. Medicine was thrown everywhere, shelves were overturned, and there was a dried bloodstain that looked like somebody had been dragged into the backroom. But besides the mess it looked like the safest area in the store, there was thick plexi glass blocking the counter, and a heavy metal door as the only entrance into the pharmacy.

"We haven't touched much but the pain medication we recognized and some antibiotics, but everything else is a mystery to us. There's a small break room back there, but it gets no light since there's no windows, but you're welcome to stay in there. If you would sort the stuff you know into marked bottles it would help us in case we ever have to leave." He gave me a small smile.

"I think I'd much rather prefer this than the roof." I admitted, the nights would start to get colder and I didn't want Sophia to get sick. She hadn't had her first cold yet, and when she did I'd have to watch her constantly just to make sure she would be okay.

"Alright, it's about time for my watch I'll send someone down with your stuff, and you can get to work." He nodded to me and fled my presence.

"Let's get to work sweetie." I mumbled, looking at my tired daughter that was nodding off on my shoulder. Her face was still a dried mess of carrots, that I'm sure had transferred to my dirty clothes as I held her. "Let's see if we can find something to clean you up with in here. I'm sure that there must be some tissues, huh?" I pushed my full body weight against the door, and it creaked open. It was dark in here, only illuminated by the little light of the candles and LED lanterns lit throughout the store. I'd have to ask for some candles next time I ran into somebody.

But besides the mess and the bloodstain on the floor it was quite clean in here compared to the rest of the store. It was dusty but it smelled clean, it wasn't tainted like the rest of the store was. My arms had started to tire from carrying Sophia all day long and I searched for someplace to set her down for her nap. There was a plush chair next to the break room door and I tested the sturdiness to make sure that it wouldn't tilt foreword and Sophia would roll off it. It seemed sturdy enough, it was by no means a crib but it would have to do. I set her down and striped off my outer shirt, wincing as it pulled on my cuts that were beginning to scab over, to create a barrier between her and the edge of the chair.

I was left in my black tank top, which I was thankful for because, the temperature was starting to rise outside. I was also thankful that I didn't have longer hair like Lori and some of the other women in the group it would be a pain to maintain. But my haircut had never been my choice; I loved my long hair when I was younger. The pixie but had always been carried out by Ed as another way for him to dehumanize and defeminize me.

I decided to leave the medicine alone for a moment; I wanted to see the room that I'd be living in for awhile. I made my way to the door in the back, and pushed it open. Inside was pitch black, if I held my hand out in front of my face I doubt I would be able to see it.

I took a few steps into the room and paused, listening for any thing that might be in there. I knew it was foolish; they must've cleared the entire place by now, so there was no need to listen for anything. We were safe here, right? I kept trying to reassure myself that we were finally safe, no Ed, we had people to protect us now so we wouldn't be ripped apart by walkers. I felt an overwhelming sense of relief. We were safe. We were safe! I slid down the wall just inside the room. The tears then came shaking my body with the intensity of my sobs. I don't know how long I stayed like that, getting everything out of my system, I felt so…well I don't quite know what I was feeling at the moment. Relief? Fear? Guilt? Appreciation? Maybe it was a combination of all of them, I felt like a muddled mess right now.

"I'll jus' put ya stuff right here." I looked up, embarrassment colored my face. He set down my belongings by the door, and looked at me awkwardly. Great, he helped me yesterday and today, and most of all he was a key part of convincing the group to let me stay. Now he has to deal with my tears, my pathetic little break down didn't need an audience. Daryl didn't seem like the type of man that was good with other people's emotions, or people in general. I murmured a croaked thank you, and closed my eyes, leaning my head against the wall. I didn't want to look in his eyes and see pity, I needed to be stronger, for Sophia.

"I'll tell Glenn to bring ya some candles." I didn't hear him leave but he must've because the next time I turned around he was gone. If I knew anything I knew that that man is silent in everything he does.

I scrubbed my face with the palm of my hands. The pity party was over and I needed to keep up the charade that I knew what I was doing. I knew that I wouldn't be able to keep it up for long, so I needed a plan. My car was still out there so I had a mode of transportation. All I needed was to siphon some gas, collect enough supplies for us both for a couple of weeks until we could find someplace safe. Maybe deeper into the woods would be safer, there would be wild life I could somehow learn to catch, I could find a cabin of some sort wait it out. Or maybe my old neighborhood would work better. I could find a house a couple of blocks away, most of the older homes have well access, I even remember seeing a few solar panels on a couple as I was driving here. If Ed was still alive I'd be able to avoid him, he surely wouldn't know I was anywhere near him. There were so many options beyond that, I didn't know what to pick. I guess for now, we'll concentrate on building up supplies.

I picked myself up from the floor and took a better look at the pitch-black room. My eyes had adjusted some so I could see shapes of objects. It looked like there was a table and a couch, maybe a couple of chairs. It'd certainly be more comfortable than the gravel roof. I decided to wait for Glenn to bring me some candles before going in further. Who knows what mess could await me in here. The bloodstain on the floor clearly leads in here; who knows if they cleared the body out.

I turned to walk out of the break room when something grabbed my leg. It was cold and it held my leg in a iron grasp, it was only then that I noticed the groaning. My sobs must've alerted it to my presence. I tried to jerk my leg free but it wouldn't let go, it then decided to fight back, with one hard yank my body crashed to the ground and I let out a blood-curdling scream.

**A/N: Cliffhanger? No? Ah well the next update will come faster since I just finished my short story. Review!**


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